in imageI will show this photo to the kind
young nurses who tend to me in my
end days.
I will tell them that we could see
through the two Os on the 2009
glasses
(7?)
They'll say "what is a photo"
because everything will be available
in their eyeballs, black mirror style.
And we'll laugh and laugh. And I'll
expire with the last words on my
lips being, "I didn't need buccal fat
surgery in my 20s, you fucking
bitches!
"
atara lizbeth
Cericalmartinson
@cryscan18
pujaloveit

in imageLumberzack
@ItsLumberzack
Budweide
one time at this bar in nashville, the
band stopped playing and asked the
audience "who here is from plant city,
florida" and this girl goes
"WOOOOOOO!!!!"
she thought they were giving her
hometown a shout out, but it was
because they found her lost i.d.
i think about her often
nalar

in imageALL
0:06
Me trying to clear
my mind while
meditating
thewell
(It's
to be
ok, they' re allowed
there)

in imageDo you remember going to raves?
Me neither. This is a rug under a
coffee table
@openlygayanimalls

in imagetodd dillard
@toddedillard
asked my 5-year-old what she wanted
for dinner and she said "not a burned
quesadilla" bc in the summer of 2019 |
overcooked one side of her quesadilla
2:20 PM • 3/3/21 • Twitter for iPhone
46.3K Retweets 4,914 Quote Tweets 713K Likes
why is this so funny. that
quesadillas not the only
thing gettin burned.

in image0:38
Today was the first time
Albert ever saw snow. He
was so excited he ran to get
the goats.
upworthy

in image0:15
IF YOU THINK TAKING
CARE OF YOUR
HEALTH IS EXPENSIVE
ashtanganurse

in image0:13
The fact that this aired on National
Television
SPEARS IN THE CROSSFIRE
CNN
SINGER SPOKE WITH
"CROSSFIRE" CO-HOST
LARGEST WINE-CONSUMING STATE, TO LE
makeup__lover

in imageAE
0:11
fitnessgayz | burlington throat factory
@fitnessgayz
Me on Ticketmaster trying to buy
Beyoncé tix
A
fitnessgayz

in imageB
lostinhistorypics
MISS
lostinhistorypics Miss World 1994, Aishwarya Rai alongside
her mother having lunch with her Miss World Crown on.
a full vibe
h/t @mor.eye.ah

in imageHell yeah I'm an
entrepreneur dude.
Words Gendersauce
I leave string and bits of hair outside my
window for the birds to use in their nests
and they're beginning to bring me secrets.
@gendersauce

in imageHell yeah I understand
the internet dude.
Words Gendersauce
It's tubes that hold hands and are
all saying stuff it's just like
mycelium dude.
@gendersauce

in imageI'm a little bit stir-crazy, but I'm trying to calm
down. But maybe I'm not meant to be calmed down.
@evanrosskatz

in imageapparently there's a
football theme party
happening today.
90
@zaldynyc

in imageWere y'all expecting Rihanna to be like:

in imageIn today' s edition of
"Your mind created your
reality.."
T
Pa
BELE
@npr
Grocery store dates
are the best date.

in imageMe at 18: as long as I get home at
4am, I can get up for work at 6
Me now: How dare you even
suggest we start a movie at 8pm
@mythera pistsays

in imageMolly McNearney •
@mollymcnearney
Sorry I didn't respond to your email. I
read it at a stoplight taking my kids to
school and remembered it 4 months
later.
@scarymommy

in image4
•
0:44
LIFE TIP No. I:
Have a friend who
remembers everything.
peterzachari

in image"Persistence without
insight will lead to the
same outcome."
ADHD:
@adhd_memetherapy
CU fuckin do it again
@adhd_memetherapy

in imageWords Gendersauce a
T
I am the
universe's
gag gift to
itself.
Art Aris Moore
@gendersauce

in image0:59
/
TikTok
@travelingalexis
Americans living abroad:
what is one time you
realized America really
messed you up?
При
roguednc

in imageThe only Beyoncetickets I can afford.
gr
@letsgetsickeninggg

in image0:16
"That's not
functional!"
whealth and the.shirtlessdude

in image"us gossiping" - @esitzler
"here I come, back on my bullshit." @daniidoesyoga

in imageSundays with Charlie be like
Read the part again where
she burns her whore mouth
on my porridge
@gayunclemario2

in imagecc: @vanessisamess
0:36
abrosimovprogress

in imageAriana Ghandi
@gayunclemario2

in imageMe: give it to me straight doc
Doc: you-
Me: no wait, give it to me gay
Doc: *snaps fingers* girl bye ur dying
random.ape
rrunny.ce
@official_lady_bunny

in image@thehilarious.ted

in imageAfter listening to his owner drone on
for hours, Ralph suddenly realized
he was NOT cut out to be an
emotional support dog after all.
@just_4jokes

in imageShe's everything. He's just Ken.
60D
Words Gendersduce
I'm a mystery even to myself.
@gendersauce

in image"Up until this point, I only knew Ken from afar. I didnt know
Ken from within. I doubted my Ken-ergy. I didn't see it. But
Margot [Robbie] and Greta [Gerwig] conjured this out of me."
- Ryan Gosling at CinemaCon
@evanrosskatz

in imageGLENN CLOSE
GLENN CLOSE,
BUT NO CIGAR
@gayunclemario2

in imageADHD: Just sleep 20 more
minutes
ADHD: How about 30 minutes
ADHD: Just skip work
ADHD: Just quit your job
@adhd_memetherapy
a ,
L
@adnd_memetherapy

in imageSimba: My uncle killed my father and is
trying to kill me now.
Timon and Pumbaa: Oh wow have you tried
just not fucking worrying about it?
@dr_espen

in image1:20
P IS THIS THE REAL LIFE P
fallontonight and itsjojosiwa

in imageIt's better at
40 (-12 days!)
than it was at 30.
Ijust care more now
0:21
ADHD'ers Getting Ready
Struggling to getting up
cobywattsmusic and adhdfamily.

in imageWhen ADHDers are cleaning
their room and find a box
of random sh*t:
Cadhd_memetherapy
7C
@adhd_memetherapy

in image0:21
Me every time I look at the huge pile
of laundry in my room that needs to
be folded and organized
AO
middleclassfancy

in imageTHINGS I
NEED TO DO
TRIED LIFTING IT ALL
AT ONCE AND FAILED
SO | GUESS I WON'T
DO ANY OF IT.
®
raminnazer
@raminnazer

in imageDE
1) if you don't post
about an ice plunge, you
didn't do it.
2) I seem to be having a
very good time,
comparatively.

in imageif you've heard me humming a song for the last week...

in imageMy parents in their 30s
Me in my SOs 40s
PADAM
PADAM

in imageI was like look at this
queen doin some grace
jones..
1:14
(this is THE queen Grace
Jones! Ageless!)
houseofgangstersaysrelax

in image@clubcumining
нт

in image0:07
sesamestreet

in imageLuke
@Beardynoise
Not gay as in "I empathise with
the plight of the X-men" but queer
as in "Magneto was right"
11:05 PM • 25 Aug 17
3 543 Retweets
12K
Likes
V
@mr_wrightawal

in imagemerleloosen
Panger Twins - Check Out (What I Got)
0:37
*stitch incoming*
samramsdell5

in image0:22
A Black bear swims the Gulf
of Mexico and runs on the
beach in Destin, Florida
QONLYINFLORIDAA
onlyinfloridaa
"," !

in image0:24
Don't come after the
Gen Xers!
10.7K
1428
Bryan P!3| Lee:47
30s beit decade prove me wrong agenx
Fgeretiktokers #millennial_ more
/ orgnal soend - brymninhediee
...mine eh
ibjohnallen

in image"Can you explain this
gap in your resume?"
THAT'S WHEN I
WAS ACQUIRING
THE SECRETS OF
ANCIENT OCCULT
KNOWLEDGE
@wordsarevibrations
@dr_espen

in imageSHAWTY GOT THEM SNAPPLE POSSUM
JEANS
даравлв
@mommysinsidevoice

in imageAlliance Festival out in the Mojave Desert.
Like at a mainstream festival, people are out there with like all this ego.

in imageI'm sorry if you get seven texts in a row
from me saying something I could have
said in one message but l am who l am.
@mytherapistsays

in imageSara K. Runnels
@omgskr
I'm not gullible enough to be lured into a cult but
1am nosy enough
@omgskr

in imageStop giving
me your
toughest
battles
@dr_espen
It's a bookcase
from IKEA whict
you bought.
Why are you
crying?

in imageME ENCOURAGING MY BESTIE NOT TO
TAKE THE HIGH ROAD WHEN THEY ARE
DISRESPECTED
@doyouknowdono
@doyouknowdono

in imageAA
I'm just Ken and I'm enough.
And I'm great at doing stuff.
@evanrosskatz

in imageTIMESCANNER
@timescanner
Be a Kermit the Frog. Have a
creative vision and no ego.
Recognize the unique talents of
those around you. Attract weirdos.
Manage chaos. Show kindness. Be
sincere.
@iamthürtyai
(the no ego thing not
withstanding, re: me)

in imageFIXBC
Summer Events at DC Public Libraries
Sat, July 15 | 1-3pm
Mt Pleasant Library | 3160 16th St NW
DEPARTMENT
OF ENERGY &
ENVIRONMENT
DC Public Library
@mtpleasantlibraryfriends
*shows them his love
life*

in imageWhen the yoga teachers gonna strike tho
namaste

in imageNot currently trying to advance my practice
Not currently trying to advance my practice But instead working on what I want to maintain My whole life is vacation practice tbh

in imageSHOW
raminnazer
@raminnazer

in imageat least it's
Something
@raminnazer
@ raminnazer

in imageGeorgie @geogre_j • 23h
Not a soul can clock
·á
@rpdrfamily

in imagethis is Charlie but make it pigeons.
a butterfly garden
this is Charlie but make it pigeons.

in imageазтсв шкашай
Mind ouf
@gayunclemario2

in imagegame recognizes game.
clock the 7-11 coffee.
game recognizes game. clock the 7-11 coffee.

in imageC°LAVANDERIA
Epoe
A ROM
HORARTO
SUPER
GEMINIS
you see it you get me

in imageDaDDy Long Arms @michaeljoelhall

in image@tsmadison

in imageTiffany Haddish
turned her
darkest moments
into comedy gold
(Chrisean Rose for The Washington Post)
@washingtonpost
Her memoir "Last Black
Unicorn" is

in imageSHE'S
BROKEN
SHE'S
BROKEN
LAPD
919
AND KEN
VENICE
66
•sr•
60
@shitheadsteve and @moistbuddha
I havent seen yet but I
keep seeing pics of Ken
and it's just always me

in imageFIREFIGHTER YOGA BALL CHALLENGE 😮
work be like
THIS MIGHT JUST BE THE MOST SYNCHRONISED FIREFIGHTING DUO YOU'LL EVER SEE!

in imageNO TRAUMA
Bonding AT
THE BAR!
- The
staft
@healingfromhealing

in imageAn unexpected event will soon
make your life more exciting.

in imageYou could prosper in the
field of entertainment.

in imageVERSATILITY IS ONE OF
YOUR OUTSTANDING TRAITS.
PANDA EXPRESS

in image‹ Back
(
03:36
1%
-6:40:47
SOUND LIBRARY®
A CHESEA
BORMRLME
HANDLER Beek
ANIZIC'PY
LES THAT
CHELSFA
HANDLER
TOLD ME
BY CHELSEA'S FAMILY.
FRIENDS AND grHER VICTMS
COMPLETE & UNABRIDGED
Narrated by
Chelsea Handler
and Friends
LHhachette
AUDIO
4 1m
®
II
Chapter 1
ABLE OF CONTENTS
Gambling on no Death.
27m •
03:00
04:00
05:00

in imageNo one: what's your 23 year plan ?
Me:
2000
2001
2010
2023
@evanrosskatz

in imageMy Favorite Drill To Instantly Improve Shoulder Mobility
So simple. So good. Also, gives ballroom. 🤚🤚🤚 yas yas yas

in imageDon't mind me, just watching "Red,
White, and Royal Blue" three more
times before Tuesday.
l've never felt this
way about anyone.
It's like there's a rope
attached to my chest.
And it keeps pulling
me toward you.
@evanrosskatz
What I mean to
say is, Henry... I-

in imageWhen your bestie says "we go" and then you go.

in image"Slumming it in Shaw"
@compasscoffeedc
Gevanrosskatz

in imageyes, of course you can have a meltdown today,
just a little one as a treat
@mythera pistsays
IS THIS ABOUT ME OR YOU?
MJH
Person Reading This

in imageGet sale prices and 2% back in ExtraBucks Rewards*.*
and 2w backa red
CatraCars" card reguired 2% back in ExtraBucks Rewards" on qualifying purchases in store or online, available to redeem on your
nezt perchase. 2ªis calculated on purchase price, minus coupons and discounts, and before tax. Terms and conditions apply
Get details at CVS.com/ExtraCare.
NO CA
needed a treat after practice, then
realized the snack was me.
Tetneo ni
Scan Item ar
Monutor ink Ay
P,
vopianacy
1418P STREET NW, WASHINGTON, DC
ARMACY: 939-5735
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Enter your phone numl
to get ExtraCare saving
and rewards.
Use My Own Bag
Finish and P

in imageNeurodivergent Barbie
ADHD Edition
- Hyperfocused Stare
- Can do everything at once
- Can also do nothing
- Can change multiple careers
- No concept of time
TENN
HAS
ADHD
Bonus option to sit in towel
for multiple hours while
staring at the wall
@jennhasadhd

in imagejoeymillero
idk how to set an out of office
message but if I did this would be it.
• CRABCAKE FACTORY SEAFOOD HOUSE
@michaelgeavanni@smashigram
@michaeljaelhall

in imageTRABCANE
or maybe

in image•How am I supposed
to contain
multitudes when all
things are one?
Art Guy Rubicon
Words @Gendersauce
@gendersauce

in imageArt Guy Rubicon
@gendersauce
1 am full of shit.
Words @Gendersauce

in imageGood luck breeding those lions
@gayunclemario2

in imageFORKLIFT FAIL CAUGHT ON CAMERA
Ashtanga be like

in image@STOREHOUSE.VA
ONE THING ABOUT ME,
NO MATTER HOW BAD THE
SITUATION IS, IM GONNA
CRACK A LIL
JOKEY JOKE.
@storehouse.va
c/o @brandonisfun

in imageIn Todays News:
Top 5 most desirable cities:
1. Seattle, WA
2. Tampa, FL
3. Charlotte, NC
4. New York, NY
5. Denver, CO
Top 5 least desirable cities:
1. Washington, D.C.
2. Baltimore, MD
3. Atlanta, GA
4. Buffalo, NY
5. Birmingham, AL
Comments?
#zz

in imageTODAY
Adam Perry
@misterperry
My son when I tell him to smile vs when
1 yell out "poop!"
NRERAI
@todayshow and @todayparenus

in imageTo all my friends who had something
to say about Florida on that list:
unusual whales &
@unusual_whales
Florida is the number 1 state bringing in and
keeping the young and rich, per SmartAsset.
unusualwhales.com
@unusualwhales

in imageWords Gendersauce
Art Sidney Nolan
Enlightenment isn't a
competition of who can have
a stick farther up their ass.
cenelers

in imageWords Gendersauce
Art Sidney Nolan
The universe's sense of
humor is part of what makes
it divine.
gendersauce

in imagetea jay
@teejiay
just found out going ham is short for
hard as a motherfucker and honestly i
just thought we all really liked ham and
now i dont know what to feel
@boozybetch

in imageFit ON TS
NOT
CIARANTEN
))

in imageLIVE SO
THAT IF
YOUR LIFE
WAS A BOOK
FLORIDA
WOULD
BAN IT
@gayunclemario2

in imageRead me, Gary.
garyjanetti
If you' re over forty and you' re
posting motivational quotes it's
too late.

in image8:32 AM
Replied to your story
L
Corpse pose
Stop it
When your mom
tells you to
stop being extra.

in imageIF ONLY THERE WERE
NO NEW IDEAS
FOR A WHOLE YEAR
//11/
AND I DEVELOPED A KEEN
INTEREST IN FINANCE AND
ADMINISTRATIVE WORK
raminnazer
@raminnazer

in imagerandy
@randypaint
mexico fucking nailed it with food man
they were just like here's a tortilla,
meat, & cheese. the tortilla's open. u
like that? uh oh, remix, now it's closed.
still delicious. unreal
a.i2vio,
SONTMIIYC
@moistbuddha

in imageMe, every morning, when I show up with an
hour left in the practice schedule
@incorrectmethod
=
Brock
@ImTheeBrock
Sorry I'm late I sat on my bed in a towel
for 45 minutes staring at the wall
@incorrectmethod

in imageWE ALL DO IT.
I GOOGLED MY HIGH SCHOOL ARCH NEMESIS,

in imagePOV: a yoga teacher that knows you for five
minutes is about to ask "how does that land
for you?" after giving you the most unhinged
and tone-deaf unsolicited lifestyle advice ever
@healingfromhealing
@healingfromhealing

in imageBICYCLE
PARKING
Ду
Alabama, y'all.

in imageunusual whales •
@unusual_whales
Popeyes have overtaken KFC as the number
2 chicken chain in the US, per CNBC.
unusualwhales.com
@unusualwhales

in imageH''i''
1'
|
In fact, you have even less time
than you did a moment ago.
aminnazer
@raminnazer

in imageBut don't freak out over that,
there's no time.
• raminnazer
@raminnazer

in imageThe word
'phonetically' doesn't
even start with an f.
Shit like this is why
aliens fly straight
past us.
@the.language.nerds

in image@BSIDETONGUE
happy halloween to baby clifford
dressed as a ghost
@beigecardigan

in imageFrom @suenodevida_ecu
Is this one big
or two l need to know
(But also, hope it's
two and they're
having a lot of fun)

in imageHave a panic attack.
You've earned it.
@disappointingaltirma
@disappointingaffirmations

in imageA
Aa
Told the mysore folks I was going to
spend all afternoon playing the new
Mario.
MS
Dumh
arton
Oaks
Park
KAL
JPONT
GEORGETOWN
Outdoor Run
WEST END
Active Calories
745CAL
Distance WN
5.02 MI
appropriately shamed by the
mysore community, I went on a run
before Mario.

in imageCrossFit
AME
r/crossfit
u/Southern_Ostrich_564 • 3h
How do you know when not to do a
second crossfit workout in the same
day?
A. You feel tired.
B. There is pain in at least one shoulder and one
knee
C. You are getting behind in other responsibilities
(work, school, family...)
D. All of the above.
Ok, I had to write this post so that I can tell myself
that it is okay to live to fight another day.
CrossFit is the
Ashtanga of the
fitness world.
elevenstewart • 3h
When l've done a first one.
5 Reply
+
44 ฿
lochnah • 1h
When I'm warming up for the first one
•. 5
7
Squab21 • 34m
I came here to say this. There is never a reason
for a second cf workout.
•.
5
T
2 д
RevoDS • 3h
This is the way
•..
r
1 2

in imageIt's slutty librarian, right?
NICKI
$20,160
ERIC
$2,000
BERTHA
$4,650•
.
0
S
AA
a
S
A
R
eS
A
c
R
A
OCCUPATION
abc
A
@dchobert

in imageI'M NOT OFFENDED
michelle as Brit as dolly
michelle as Brit as dolly

in imageL
Cowboy Matrix Pumpkin
la.
V
Cfas
@michaelgeovanni

in imagethanks @stuiestyle for being that
deer for me!
me trying to send telepathic love to other
queer people i see in public
ur doing great
@gayunclemario2

in image@MrSloaneRanger
How to tell if you have gay brain:
You read this as "it's giving season" instead of
"it's giving season."
If you understand the distinction between the
two identical sentences you may be eligible for
compensation
IT'S
Giving
SEASONE
@gayunclemario2

in imageDrew Angerer/Getty Images
Rep. George Santos used campaign
funds to pay for Botox and OnlyFans,
House ethics report finds
Nov. 16, 2023
npr
So what you're saying is
he's not all bad
@nprpolitics and @npr

in imageY una Coca Cola light por favor
inales
@4juancho8

in imageLiv 😛
@liv_username
My 5 year plan is to hang out with my
friends and tell them i love them
4:07 PM • 8/27/22 • Twitter for iPhone
@gayunclemario2

in imageHow it started
=
ChatGPT 4 >
I want you to make an image of a wellness
influencer influencing
ChatGPT
1
Here's an image of a wellness influencer, a
female of South Asian descent, conducting a
live stream session in a serene, beautifully
designed home environment, influencing her
diverse audience.
J
@healingfromhealing

in imageHow it's going
ChatGPT
Here's an image depicting the embodiment of
ultimate influence, a formless, omnipresent
wellness force pervading the cosmos.
@healingfromhealing

in imageChatGPT
Here's an image depicting the ultimate,
unimaginable state of healing, transcending
all known dimensions and realms, where
healing has become a fundamental aspect of
existence itself.
@healingfromhealing

in imageJE You
Too much healing! That person is now unwell,
stuck in an endless pattern of consumption of
wellness products and services and
obsessively trying to track their every feeling
and thought. Show me
ChatGPT
Here's an image of a person who has become
unwell due to overindulgence in wellness
products and services, surrounded by an
excessive array of wellness gadgets and
overwhelmed by the constant need to monitor
their health and emotions.
ninealınig

in imageGEMINI FOUR MOODS
idgaf lol
crying on the
inside
-@glossy zodiac
oversharing &
talking too much
not talking at
all
@glossy_zodlac

in imageRecents
1:26
0:47
1:30
1:30
2:13
1-20
0:41
0:43
1:20
2:34
1:08
1•2
1:40
O
:29
1:55
1:45
0:36
Ask me about my wiener!

in imageJust checking in with you a year
after that motivational quote
you posted to see how your new
life is.
@garyjanerui

in imageunusual whales
@unusual_whales
George Santos is filling a complaint with the Office of Congressional
Ethics against Congresswoman Nicole Malliotakis for her stock trading.
Nicole Malliotakis bought New York Community Bancorp, $NYCB, on
March 17.
24 hours later, $NYCB announced buying out Signature Bank.
unusualwhales.com
@unusualwhales

in imageFuck modern anarchist
aesthetics.
Art Jacques Callot Words Gendersauce
This is a sequins and feathers
anarchist household.
@gendersauce

in imageStop worrying so much
about everything.
Udisappointingaffirmations
Instead, pick one thing and obsess
over it constantly until it consumes
your every waking thought and
haunts you in your sleep
@disappointingaffirmations

in imagePeople who secured a 2.1% 30
year fixed mortgage in 2021
@iomocapitall

in imagejudydcz
Qaborzet
amie
EDCZLEGAL
@wanderful.wally

in imageIf you' re over 40 and you' re
posting motivational quotes
it's too late.
@garyjanerui

in imageLooks
fade but cunty is forever.
@garyjanerui

in imageIn 2024 I'm bringing back t-shirts over long
sleeve tees.
@millennial_misery

in imageNot Canada's Drag Race Season 4
Rusical being a contendor for
franchise best
the first gay stealing the rainbow from
god

in imagetoxic king •
@777jorgeivan
New year, new me. I'm gonna be worse
17:37 • 26/12/2022 from Earth • 10M Views
@banhass

in image10
co
v
It has recently come to my attention
that it is not the 31st.